How can I help a friend through domestic violence situation?

Molly Ticehurst's three closest friends never thought someone their age could be a victim of a domestic violence homicide.

Molly was stabbed to death by ex-partner Daniel Billings in April 2024. Earlier this month Billings was sentenced to 28 years in jail with a non-parole period of 20 years.

"It still feels like we're living in a horror movie. I never had thought that would have been the outcome for her," friend Gaby Shepherd told Australian Story.

Aidan Clarke, who knew Molly from the time they were both babies, said he did not think intimate partner violence was a problem for young people.

"The image is a 45 to 55-year-old male comes home from the pub, the wife asks where they were and they slap them around a bit," Mr Clarke said.

In fact, rates of intimate partner violence for 16 to 24-year-olds are higher than for those aged 45 and older, according to the Australian Child Mistreatment Study published in 2021.

The study found that 48 per cent of 16 to 24-year-olds surveyed had experienced psychological, physical or sexual abuse at the hands of a partner, compared to 40 per cent of people aged 45 and older.

"These are things you see on TV, on the news. This doesn't happen in our little community. This doesn't happen to my best friend," Ms Shepherd said.

She said she "holds a lot of guilt" for not stepping in when she realised that Molly was in an abusive relationship.

But recognising a friend is at risk of harm, and safely stepping in to help, can be tricky.

Triple j hack has asked two experts for advice on what to do if you think a loved one is in a domestic violence situation. Here's what they told us.

Pia Birac, the deputy CEO of Domestic Violence NSW, said the first step was simple: listen uncritically to what they're telling you about what's happening in their relationship.

Karen Bevan from Full Stop Australia said you shouldn't dismiss the severity of the problem if your loved one is young.

"One of the things that's really important is that we take it seriously because young people's relationships are serious, they're important to them at that time," she said.