BOFH: Schrödinger's petty cash puts us in a very awkward superposition

EPISODE 16: "So it looks like we have ourselves a Schrödinger's cash situation," I say.

"We have a what now?" asks the very junior beancounter - the sort that will be first up against the wall when the AI revolution comes (in a couple of weeks).

"A Schrödinger's cash situation.

You have a petty cashbox with a variable amount of money in it, which depletes at an unknown rate.

Depletion being what it is, at some point the cashbox will have no cash in it.

If I ask you to open your cashbox - and pay out my expenses - I can guarantee that you'll say the cashbox is empty." "It is empty," he replies.

"Only it's NOT empty," the PFY says, "because we can see the petty cash spreadsheet reflected off the glass of the picture on the wall behind you." "You couldn't read that.

It'd be back to front." "Back to front like 8753?" I ask.

"Sorry?" "8753 - the reverse of the PIN number you used to unlock your computer just now," I say.

"How did..." "Or 'now here they're," the PFY adds, "the reverse of the quick email you sent when we came in." "I.." "Let's just say that we have a particular set of skills, skills acquired over very long careers..." I say.

"Reading reflected letters, upside down words, etc.

Anyway, we'd really appreciate it if you'd reimburse us now." ...

No one likes petty cash.

Beancounters hate it because they have to handle actual cash, and everyone else hates it because the petty cash reimbursement process is subject to a level of scrutiny that His Majesty's Customs and Revenue can only aspire to.