My relationship with my tween son has changed over the years. Changing my approach to our dynamic has helped.

The author and her son on a walk.

Courtesy of Ashley Archambault My son and I are close, but I've noticed changes in him as he inches toward being a teen.

I've had to adjust my thinking about his behavior and our dynamic over time.

I have also put more effort into learning about his interests.

It's paid off.

My son is 12, almost 13.

I always prided myself on having an awesome relationship with him, so it's difficult to admit that some of the stereotypical, totally natural teenage behaviors he's starting to exhibit have hit me hard.

Our relationship has started to change as he's grown up, and I've struggled with how to approach our dynamic.

Mostly, it's because I love talking to him, but as he's become more independent, he's been less inclined to chat.

Thinking about him from my perspective as a teacher helps As a former middle school teacher, I realized, to my horror, that my son is now a middle schooler.

One of those strange beings I used to teach every day lives with me! But this realization really helped me see that I could apply some of my classroom management skills to our situation at home.

Not every new behavior I'm noticing is worth worrying about.

For instance, my son pushes the boundaries with certain things he says — like an inappropriate comment here and there — but I only choose to talk to him about things he says that truly require a conversation.

Otherwise, I feel as though my silence speaks volumes.